Feelings of the Heart – a ghazal?

I wrote this ghazal in my mother tongue Axomiya (Assamese) yesterday and tried to translate it to Hindi. After a few futile attempts, I gave up as I just could not maintain the rhythm. Today I tried translating it to English and found that it was flowing much more smoothly though I should not call it a ghazal. I tried to follow the rules as closely as I could but not sure if I succeeded. Hence the question mark in the title. I post the poems in the order written.

মনৰ খবৰ – এটি গজল

সুধিছানে কেতিয়াবা এন্ধাৰ ৰাতিৰ আকাশত অকলশৰীয়া তৰাটিৰ মনৰ খবৰ,
কাণ পাতি শুনা যদি, শুনিবা নিশ্চয়, হৃদয়ত গুপুতে ৰখা বেদনাৰ খবৰ।

কুলু কুলু শব্দ কৰি বৈ যোৱা জুৰিটি মিলি যায় স্ৰোতস্বিনী নদীৰ লগত,
নিদিবা ভেটা তাক, যাব দিয়া নিজ মনে, কঢ়িয়াই সাগৰলৈ মনৰ খবৰ।

পাহাৰ শিখৰত বহি চোৱা যদি দিগন্তলৈ, দেখিবা অসীমত হেৰাই যোৱা দিগবলয়,
সুদুৰ নিলীমত শুকুলা মেঘৰ পাল তৰা নৌকাই আনে কাৰ হৃদয়ৰ খবৰ।

দেখিছানে কেতিয়াবা জোনাক ৰাতি, কলীয়া ডাৱৰে আৱৰি ধৰা পূৰ্ণিমাৰ জোনটিক,
সন্দেহৰ ডাৱৰে আৱৰে যদি মন, নোকোৱাকৈ যাব ৰৈ গোপনে তোমাৰ বুকুৰ খবৰ।

কিয়‌ হেৰৌ অহৌবলীয়া ত‌ই কৰিছ চলাথ বিচাৰি শান্তিৰ নীড়,
পৃথিৱীত কোনেও নকৰে সময় নষ্ট, বিচাৰি তোৰ মনৰ খবৰ।

have you ever asked the lonely star, on the dark night sky, feelings of his heart,
if you listen well, sure you will hear, the pain of secrets hidden in his heart.

gurgling soothingly, flows down the stream to merge with the rapidly flowing river,
don’t dam it, let it flow freely to the sea,with the feelings of its heart.

the horizon viewed from the summit presents a skyline lost in the embrace of eternity,
sailboats of white clouds floating on the distant blue skies brings news of whose heart?

ever seen, on a moonlit night, dark clouds covering the face of the full moon,
if clouds of doubt darkens the mind, unspoken shall remain secrets of one’s heart.

oh you insanely infatuated, searching incessantly for abode of peace,
who in the world shall waste time understanding feelings of a lunatic’s heart?

Author: pranabaxom

Poetry is my passion. I am not a methodical writer. I have no set topics to write about. What I feel, perceive, think about, I will like to share in this blog. I open my mind to the world. Like the weather, sometimes my poems are cloudy, sometimes stormy. I always like to see sunshine streaming through the leaves of trees, so I hope I can share some of those sunshine with my readers.

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