Oh genie, where art thou

In a month’s time it’s time for the wedding
No, not mine, my old country I am visiting
But the happy occasion is turning to a bad dream
My better half wants to see me fit and thin
To the store she goes and shirts she brings
That are not for me but for people trim and slim
I can fit into those only in my dream
Every ounce of my body fat is shamed and screams
Oh, how I have dreamt of good food and sweets
Now it will only turn to month long fight to be fit
Madly I hope my bottle of water will turn to a magic drink
One gulp of the magic potion and voila, I shrink
With sinking hurt and a feeling of doom, the slim fit shirts I button
Over the protest of my tortured body and protruding belly button
Dread the day when one extra sweet and my shirt flies open
Oh genie, where art thou when I need the thinning boon
****************************************
Pants, that’s for another time
Time to get up from my rear end
And get my drink of water and lime
Lest I am stuck to the chair, unable to bend

My Ten Commandments

Funny New Year’s resolution as personal list of ten commandments.

My Ten Commandments

Thou shall make New Year’s resolutions
To break
Because destruction leads to creation
As proven by The Big Bang

Now that the best
Is off my chest
It is time
To make the rest

Thou shall make a To Do List
Every morning to check at night
For one or two that gets done
Others left for tomorrow but that’s alright

Thou shall eat only what you need
It’s too bad that food
That’s bad for you
Tastes so good

Thou shall workout to get rid of
The Holiday fat
Though it may be difficult
To get up from bed

Thou shall take
Good care of your health
Though in the long run
It may reduce your wealth

Thou shall be proactive
Always up and running
Though it’s much more fun
To be procrastinating

Thou shall always be happy
Even though it may be difficult
When your wallet
Is always empty

Thou shall always be positive
Always keep smiling
Keeps people guessing
What’s your ulterior motive

Thou shall always help as much as you can
Keep the exit clear, so that
When the time comes
You can always run

Last but not the least or is the other way around
Scratching my head, I have lost my count
Just to make it short and sweet
I will be brief, no more tweet

Thou shall keep your mouth shut
Silence is golden, they say
Difficult to put your foot in your (closed) mouth
Try as hard as you may

Now that I have my list of ten
It is time to revisit number one
New Year’s resolutions made to be broken
Because breaking is really fun